Why is No.7 (Columbo) a Warden here in The Village?? Because his jokes are sooo terrible.... How terrible?? SOOOO terrible that he needs......A
CAPTIVE AUDIENCE!! BA DOOM!! BA DUM!!
HEY!! The other side maybe smarter than us but we have them out ..NUMBERED!!! HA! HA !
Well you have been great audience but I have to run... like THE BLAZES FIRST CHANCE THAT I GET ...Thank you thank you very much.
The microphone is open (and so is the one in your apartment soooo step up
and try to Crack (up) No.6!!
BCNU
Tommcfearsom
[Edited on 5-9-2007 by John Ryerson]
number 6
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posted on 5-9-2007 at 10:06 PM
Why is No.7 (Columbo) a Warden here in The Village?? Because his jokes are sooo terrible.... How terrible?? SOOOO terrible that he needs......A
CAPTIVE AUDIENCE!! BA DOOM!! BA DUM!!
HhahahahhaahAHh, thats funny. Thanks for the laugh.
Be Seeing you.
Columbo
Warden
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posted on 5-10-2007 at 06:35 AM
Okay then...
Two flies on Kojak's head... one says:
"Hey - we're on telly!"
I had a monkey bath the other day... that's where the water is so hot, you step in and say:
"OOH OOH OOH!!! AH! AAAAAH!"
Two cannibals eating a clown - one says:
"Does this taste funny to you?"
What's yellow and sits in the corner scowling?
A naughty New York taxi cab!
What says "Mark Mark"?
A dog with a bust lip!
Hey... someone stop Number Six... he's trying to make a break for it - I've another 25 mins. of quality material left to deliver!
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
John Ryerson
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posted on 5-10-2007 at 04:49 PM
The Schizoid Columbo
Hello No.7 (Columbo)
HEY! HEY! You think that we don't know who you really are?? That famous cigar and that dry delivery of that kind of material?? Well here is a
Village file photo comparison and sketches drawn by The Professors wife as absolute evidence of your true idenity here in The Village Comedy Cabaret.
Take a gander at these:
Those jokes you are telling are TOO FUNNY!! Do you want No.6 to laugh himself to death!! No extreme measures.....at least not yet. I always suspected you were a double (up laughing) agent.
BCNU
Tommcfearsom
P.S. No.1 says that when you are done here a John Steed has a gig for you at some place called VaudaVilla.
[Edited on 5-10-2007 by John Ryerson]
DDL
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posted on 5-11-2007 at 10:45 AM
Mr. Ryerson... all...
You have forced me to find some 'comedy material' I posted on Youtube...
However, I'll leave it for today... you've suffered enough.
Expect a post shortly.
Meantime - carry on as you were.
Be seeing you.
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
John Ryerson
Warden
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Mood: Willing to do some wood work.
posted on 5-11-2007 at 09:05 PM
Warning Jokes Ahead
Hello Felow Villagers
No.1 would love more material in his ruthless attempt to Crack (up) No.6.
DDL A Scizoid Dog feature for the The Village Comedey Cabaret would be well...dog gone diabolical and most Well Come. Here is one senario:
Schizoid Dog: "So I Tell No.2 "Hey no RUFF stuff with Nadia"......(sound of crickets)... "Hey is this an audience or THE DANCE OF THE
DEAD!!".....(more crickets)
Scene: Room full of various cats in Cabaret with martinis glaring at No.6 The Schizoid Dog in stoney silence.
Schizoid Dog: (On Stage with microphone listening to a sympathectic but delighted soon to retire No.2) No.2: "Don't be to disapointed old chap.
After all the name of the place is The CAT and Mouse Club."
Columbo waiting breathlessly for more material ( in fact a whole lifetime we are both lifers and since the whole Earth is The Village where can we
hide??)!
BCNU
Tommcfearsom
Columbo
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posted on 5-12-2007 at 03:08 PM
Good grief - I thought my material was bad!!!
Careful with those routines sir - they're antiques!!!
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
Columbo
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posted on 5-12-2007 at 07:15 PM
You were warned...
Click only if you dare...
N.7.
[Edited on 15-5-2007 by Columbo]
"Just one more question..."
DDL
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posted on 5-12-2007 at 09:01 PM
If you keep that up, Neil, even I might start to talk.
Now here at The Village Comedey Cabaret we bring you a whole new type of torture....uh...I mean entertainment that we simply call.......!!
VAUDAVILLAGE!! Lets have a great big Village Well Come for........ **** CHENEY and his DUMMY!! ENJOY THE SHOW!
P.S. Let us know what you think of the act folks it is only showing thru January of 2009 or due to cancelation by Impeachment which ever comes first.
Columbo
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posted on 5-15-2007 at 07:40 AM
You don't know what torture is until you've seen this...
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
John Ryerson
Warden
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Mood: Willing to do some wood work.
posted on 5-16-2007 at 02:16 AM
And The Crowd Goes Wild
Hello No.7(Columbo)
So far we want you to know that we here at The Village Comedey Cabaret have really appreciated your efforts to Crack(up) No.6. So much so that we
think that you and your jokes deserve your own special platform. Here is your platform:
You will notice that so that everyone is Living In Harmony here at the Cabaret that we have a dress code so be sure to wear that extra special neck
tie when you drop down ......I mean by.
BCNU
Tommcfearsom
Columbo
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posted on 5-16-2007 at 06:11 AM
I like it... and I think at tha height, the roten fruit that is thrown can't reach!
;D
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
John Ryerson
Warden
Posts: 650
Registered: 1-9-2006
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Mood: Willing to do some wood work.
posted on 5-16-2007 at 07:19 PM
The Master
Hello No.7(Columbo)
I think we in The Village have a great deal to worry about with you as a Warden as there is no doubt you are a master of disguise. I know this
revisits some familiar material but the conclusions are unmistakeable. The only defence that I can think of is a complete ban on smoking in The
Village as the cigar is a dead give away. On the other hand given the awful jokes involved here maybe if we just have pass word starting with "Why
did the chicken cross the road........?" This was the only other question known to make The General go Ka Boom (Da Boom). Here are the only known
Village file sketches of you in your various disguises:
P.S. Hello No.7 You are sooooo right on how old my jokes are in fact here is rare Village file photo of my taking delivery on the first part of this
joke.
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posted on 5-24-2007 at 02:31 PM
Another for you -
N.7.
"Just one more question..."
John Ryerson
Warden
Posts: 650
Registered: 1-9-2006
Member Is Offline
Mood: Willing to do some wood work.
posted on 5-24-2007 at 07:40 PM
The Audience Is Listening
Hello No.7 Columbo
I have figured out that your Comedy Rambles with your adorable pooches are really ways of tracking down No.6 before No.1 finds out that he has
escaped.
Well I want you to know that your efforts will not go unrewarded as your audience is just around the next bend in the trail and that they are eagerly
awaiting to show their appreceation. Here they are:
We in the Colonies (U.S.) have heard about you excellent comedy skills at The Village Comedy Cabaret and we have an audience that we think is
particuarly deserving of a performence by you so we are shipping them over to The Village no later that January 2009. You will find them just an
inPEACHment of a crowd. Here is your new audience:
We feel we must warn you though that sometimes the staff at the Hospital can over do our world famous KOSHO WORK OUT with disaterous results like
these:
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posted on 5-29-2007 at 12:05 PM
I'm glad I gave up Kosho and took up 'Scrabble'
instead!!!
Anyhow... I thought I'd send you even further into despair with my material... read on...
Well, I auditioned for 'Britain's Got Talent' and didn't pass - not surprising given the quality of my material - I know jokes
guaranteed to wipe the mile of your face...
In fact, when I told people that I wanted to be a comedian, they laughed - well they're not laughing now!
Anyhow, I took my dogs out for a walk one day, and out of sheer boredom, I filmed part of it with the camera on my mobile phone... and decided to tell
some jokes whilst walking.
Now I thought, this ain't bad... we can get some exercise and have a bit of a laugh - and bung it on the internet to share with others.
Hopefully at some point I hope to do this with a 'live' audience - that is, go with a group of people and have a laugh and tell jokes -
I'm heavily into 'Humour Therapy' and I can see a potential for this.
But in the meantime - here's my videos - hope you like them... click on each link to view.
I must say that I always suspected this. I have finally found the man who writes your material and here is an expose on your partner in comedy
material. I must say that you certainly plumb the depths to come up with this stuff. Here is the article giving Voice to these sinister activities
here in our beloved Village.